The Philadelphia School Reform Commission, it could be argued, has never understood either the words "School" or "Reform".

The Philadelphia School Reform Commission -- which it could be argued has never understood either the words "School" or "Reform" -- yesterday, very quietly, very secretly, cut the health benefits for retired teachers, because somehow I guess the SRC's constant bungling is their fault. They also cut health benefits for current teachers, but they at least have legal steps they can take.

There's only one thing worse than the Philadelphia School Reform Commission's early morning assault on unionized teachers -- and that's the underhanded way they did it, in a fog of near secrecy, with a determination to squelch public debate. A...
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Clarence Darrow put a monkey on the stand.

Is "Planet of the Apes" complete fiction? Yes, what did you think I would say? Because it's monkeys, not apes, that get the real attention. From the History is Fun blog, 2007:

Clarence Darrow put a talking monkey on the stand. That’s right. A little monkey was sworn in, sat down, and answered Darrow’s questions for a startling half hour.

From the Dayton Herald News dated June 15, 1925:

The drama of the Scopes matter continued to fascinate and stir the wonder of this small hamlet as a thirty pound African green monkey was called to the stand to answer questions from the defense attorney, the esteemed Clarence Darrow.  A shocked crowd proceeded to hoot and holler until reprimanded by Judge John T. Raulston.  Much to the amazement of all, the monkey spoke fluently and eloquently when questioned by Darrow.  However, the greatest surprise of all came when the prosecution’s William Jennings Bryan rose to question the monkey.  Under the harsh pressure of Bryan’s inquisition, the monkey broke down and admitted his answers were coached by Darrow adding, “I don’t believe I am related to any stinkin’ [sic] humans.”  Judge Raulston dismissed the jury saying he, “needed to make sense of all this hurly burly.” The monkey was later seen at a local tavern.  By most eye witnesses accounts he was visibly intoxicated.